Fair Fact List...

OK
Alison's newest blog mentions going to the fair and one of the top Fact List facts. The very top Fact List fact was thought of by The Mom, it is:

If Alison is home, she has to answer the phone when it rings

There is a long story about this one... to be discussed later...

So, you go to the fair and you want to go on a ride. These things zip around, snap you back and forth at rib and back snapping speeds, take you in the air and sneer at and mock the laws of physics and gravity. All the while, they are groaning, rattling and shaking in a way that means that every third bolt is missing and the only thing keeping it from launching its riders into distance places in the county is centrifugal force and several layers of corn dog grease.

But not only do people go on them, they cheerfully put their kids on them. If they paused to think, they would realize that the ride was put together and is being run by someone who you usually wouldn't let park your car. (I'm sure that there are proficient and capable people that work at these fairs but I just haven't seen one yet.)

So, the Fact List fact for fairs is:

Don't ride on anything that goes in a circle or leaves the ground

I like this Fact List fact (happy smile).

The Dad

Classification...

OK
I have just a few comments and a list fact about the methods of classification for people and their personalities that become popular every few years. These methods include the Myers Briggs, the Briggs and Straton (ask somebody if you don't know about this one), the Smith and Wesson and the Peanut Butter and Jelly methods.

All of these methods require you to answer questions that give you very little room to think and do not allow for the constant and changing degrees of your life. These method tests require you to pick one of two narrowly directed statements like:
-Would you prefer to eat a live snake or find a spider in your bed... (what...)
-Do you consider yourself instrinsic or introspective... (huh...)
-Would like to discuss Shakespeare with the Predator or the "Ring" girl... (eeeee...)

You start to say,
"Wait, these statements are really weird and..."
but then the one asking the questions says
"Come on, come on, come on, ya got to choose one".
So you just pick one and go to the next.

At the end the one giving the test says,
"OK, your test results show you are a WXYZ or a NERD or a NATURALBORNKILLER."
They then look in the reference book and state,
"You would make a good long distance swimmer or a Yak herder."
Then, they read about your rating and say,
"Your life's ambition should be to work for world peace or get a really good tan."

Tested, catagorized, defined and labeled all in about 5 minutes... (mmmpfh)

OK, here is the list fact.
"Be happy and don't scare the straights"

The Dad

Max...

OK, it is time to have a fact list about dogs. Most people, if they are "real americans", have had a dog in their life at sometime or another.

Here are a few items that people already know.
A dog is "mans/womans" best friend
All dogs go to heaven
Dogs are very loyal

But, here are a few new fact list items that include the dogs currently in our lives. These are:
Baxter (the Deez), the elder statesman/woman and formerly odiferous one
EV, the young attack husky
Mister Max, the one that wants your attention all the time

The fact list items are:
-You want a dog with spirit
(even though some of them cower like a frenchman during a thunderstorm)
-With spirit, a dog would come to your assistance at anytime for your safety
(unlike a cat that would hide under a bed or go get something to eat or completely ignore you or act like you are bothering them)
-A dog keeps watch over you at all times
(of couse, this includes barking at anything that even comes close to you or your house like a jogger, a car passing by or even a random squirrel)
-A dog is not subtle and communicates almost exclusively by action.
(once you can interpret what they want, this makes your life a little easier)
-A dog teaches you about life cycles
-Dogs can talk if you listen carefully enough
(this usually centers around food or just being happy)

The Dad